FILL THIS OUT IF YOU WANT TO

1. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.
2. On a scale of 1-10, what number would you rate me of my intelligence?
3. How long have you known me?
4. When and how did we first meet?
5. What was your first impression?
6. Do you still think that way about me now?
7. What do you think my weakness is?
8. Do I talk a lot?
9. Am I out-going?
10. Am I a positive or negative person? Please explain your response.
11. What reminds you of me?
12. If you could give me anything what would it be?
13. How well do you know me?
14. When's the last time you saw me?
15. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
16. Do you think I could kill someone?
17. Describe me in one word.
18. Do you think our friendship is getting stronger, weaker, or staying the same?
19. Do you feel that you could talk to me about anything and I would listen?
20. Are you going to put this on your xanga and see what I say about you?
21. What song (if any) reminds you of me?
22. If you could change one thing about me, what would it be?
23. Do you consider me a good friend?
24. What makes me me?

funny how easilyi get disappointed.. one minute im happy, then
the memories kick in and all i want to do is ball up & cry.
hah. ive figured out what yet my life is to be but one big contradiction.

its strange how in a moments time,
my life completly changed..
changed to the point where it relyed on a simple test
& now all i have to do is wait for the "no"
and then i can live my life again.. 10.16.05

some stuff i wrote..
hah. dont completly laugh at it
i just dont know what else to say in here.
cuz no one really reads this anyway.. but okay

so let me play oh so sweetly
in my tempermental fade
inside my love and tears
are secretly conved
played ever like your tattered game
those three words
overused and cliched.

mesmerized in my chance to see you once more
my blue lined confession shot down to the floor
faintly fading to white, i take an extra dose
just for the chance for you to hold me close.

uh so..
though it is tuesday. i shall talk about my weekend
friday brett came over and we watched a movie then
went to the football game. then back to his house till 1
saturday i went to floyd's with mar and jessica
and we met up with carson, amber, and lisa.
then jacques joined us there after, cuz he ditched his homecoming
uh then there is sunday..
just about had a really good day until the end of it..
so then it became the worst day of my life.
so now im consumed by me being worried... hmm great huh?

good song:
you're something beautiful
a contradiction
i want to play the game
i want the friction..

i drift away to a place another kind of life
take away the pain, i create my paradise
everything ive held  has hit the wall
what used to be yours isnt yours at all
falling apart in all that im asking
is it a crime? am i over racting?
oh he's under my skin, just give me something to get rid of him
ive got reason to bury this alive, another little white lie

funny thing is how you make me cry
im trying to hate you so bad so i can move on
but everytime i see you it breaks my heart all over again
my desperate attempts only reach can only so far
all im asking is for you to tell me that we were'nt real
dont act like we didnt fall in love that night
& please dont pretend like i never wasnt on your mind
because im tired of drawing your name
or writing stupid letters that you never reply to
im tired of you makeing me feel so pathetic
you know this kills me inside
i can see it in the way you look at me
& all you have to do is look my way & my eyes tear up
because i knew what we could have had.

kara
had
the
best
weekend
ever.
ah,
i wanted
to freeze
it in
time
and
play it
over & over
again!

hope this isnt a temporary bliss.

short & sweet for now.
not getting too many com.ments
so i'll make it another pretty post
when im feeling up to it

if anyone wants to talk to me
my aim is ecstaticxdesire. so talk to me there, okay?